Tuesday, June 23, 2015

I'm Happy For You (Sort of...Not Really) by Kay Wills Wyma (book review)

Comparison. It's everywhere! We in America get thrown into Glimpses every day of people's lives: their perfect living rooms, their perfect recipes, their perfect baby showers or birthday parties, their perfect families. What's a Glimpse? Well that's something I learned in "I'm Happy for You (Sort of...Not Really)" by Kay Wills Wyma.

A Glimpse is exactly what those things mentioned are: glimpses of the good things in people's lives. We see what people (friends & strangers) want us to see on social media - on Facebook, Instagram, Pinterest. Those are their best moments. And what do we compare them with? Our worst moments.

I see my friend who is ever patient with her children. I see her in public and compare that with our private moments. I'm sure she has her moments she'd rather not everyone see, too!
image via amazon.com
 Wyma's book really forced me to look at how comparison runs in my life - and has the potential to ruin it! I look at everyone's best but forget that their best is not my best, necessarily. I've been trying to teach my children this lesson, too. We have these measuring sticks in life - some are good and healthy and help us reach goals, but some are really dangerous. We try to live up to others' expectations (or our own unrealistic ones) without taking into account God's plan for our life, His design of us. He doesn't make mistakes so why do I get all crabby when my house isn't HGTV ready or I can't run through a pregnancy? What does it really matter, too?

I have so many notes throughout this book but my favorite part came toward the end when Wyma's daughter was talking about being the setter in volleyball. She was upset because she wasn't a hitter and hitters get the applause. Then she thought about it, saying, "It feels good when people cheer for you...Then I thought about all the girls on the court with me and how great they must feel when people cheer for them. Then...I started to realize what a great spot the setter job is. oh my word! My whole role will be setting people up to feel good." It's ok to stare slack-jawed at this one. I did, too.

What if we, instead of comparing ourselves in made up life competitions, started to look at life as an opportunity to set people up to feel good about THEMSELVES? What if we took our eyes off of ourselves and put it on them? I believe that's one of our purposes here on earth; God made us for community but not so we could compare and compete but to build one another up.

That's my plan. I want to set people up to feel good about themselves. Is this going to be easy? No, I am very selfish and self-centered. I talk a lot about myself and forget to ask others questions or listen to them. It's going to be really hard for me, but I want to do this. How glorifying to God would this be if His people started to look at others and how to build them up?!

Disclaimer: I was given this book in order to write an honest review. Others may not have the same experience with this book as I've had.

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