seizure

Does that word make you cringe like it does me? I've had this little word in the back of my head since hearing the word "autism" linked with my son. Seizures are not uncommon for kids with autism, but they mostly start (if at all) towards puberty (possibly hormonal changes), so I was thinking I had a few more years to have this word stuck in there.

so thankful for this sweet boy who just loves this pregnant belly!

Then, two Tuesdays ago, I got a call from school. "Moose is not feeling well, you need to come to school" or something along those lines. I thought the wording was off, not 'he threw up, come get him' but didn't think much of it. Just thought it was a routine sick kid pick up so I left on lights, my sewing machine, Netflix paused.

As I pulled into the parking lot, an ambulance was parked there. Oh boy. I tried to convince myself that maybe it was there showing the classes, but I knew. And I knew it was a seizure. My thoughts were proved correct as the principal opened the outside door for me (vs. buzzing in). He spoke those words to me: "Moose had a seizure." I think he said he's fine, but I buried my face in my hands. Then I took a breath and realized I needed to hold this together for my boy. I tried calling Big A but he didn't answer so I handed my phone to the principal and asked him to call (he ended up having to call the work number to reach him).

My boy was laying on a blue bean bag chair surrounded by love in flesh. EMTs were taking blood pressure and asking questions, his teachers were talking to him, loving him, rubbing his head. Someone made room for me and I talked to him. It took him a few seconds to focus on me and find me. Then he started to try to sit up, "can we go home? I just want to go home!"

I got him to lay back down so he could get his blood pressure taken. He just wanted to go home, poor thing. Probably confused and tired. Then he sat up pretty fast (probably trying to escape) and started this cry. I knew what the cry meant and tried to get him to stick his face in a sick sack but he was fighting me. And so he threw up all over himself (and my hands...why do we moms try to catch puke??). I probably looked panicked at this point because the EMTs wanted to get us to the hospital, but in my head, I was thinking "he needs new clothes, how do I get home and get him clothes and not leave him?" His special ed teacher must have seen this look and offered to drive my van to meet me at the hospital. We carefully peeled his clothes off of him and I threw his shirt in the trash which made him mad because it was read (I will buy you another red shirt, kid!). His dear dear classroom teacher took his nasty clothes home and washed them (not kidding you, the best teacher ever!).

His special ed teacher was just distraught, thinking she should have been with him. He was walking from speech to the computer lab on his own when it happened. We are trying to teach him independence and no one could have foreseen this to happen at this precise moment, so I tried to assure her that she was doing her job and she does it so well.

I sat on the gurney and he sat on my lap (in clean clothes; thank you, Lord!) as we got put in the ambulance (never ridden in one before). I just held him and talked to him. He was lucid by this time, asking about his brother, talking about the baby (how we didn't know if it was a boy or girl), just very tired.

At the hospital, bless the Lord, I knew both nurses, both doctors, even the flobotomist (one who takes blood)! That was a relief to me. Yes, we live in a small town, but there are many nurses I do not know at the hospital, so this was comfort. The school nurse came and stayed with us the whole time. Big A met us there, thankfully; he's just the rock. The special ed teacher and speech path met us there to bring my van. I tried to reassure them that everything was going to be ok, they had done a great job like they always do.

I was just shown, though, how loved Moose is. That is one reason that we've chosen to send him to school vs. homeschooling - to share this special kiddo with others. He is awesome, and I'm biased but know other people think so, too. He's smart, funny, loving, always hungry (ha), and can talk your ear off about Star Wars/Super heroes/Mario Kart Wii but you can't help but love him. I think.

At the hospital, they took his blood (I told him it was going to suck; Big A probably wishes I'd chosen a better word...) and he screamed but it was quick. They took vitals and then let him sleep. We talked to his doctor, who is just as sweet as can be and I know would treat my son the very same way he'd treat his kids. We decided not to do a head CT because he didn't feel there was trauma despite Moose's fall (he had a goose egg). I feel so blessed to have a doctor we can trust so much.

Moose slept for a long while (I got the phone call at just prior to 1:00), maybe until 3:00. Then he drank some OJ and asked for cookies (he likes the vending machine cookies at the hospital) so we knew he was doing ok. I had to go pick up Squirt and some neighbor girls at 3:20 so I left while he was released but basically, we have no clue as to why this happened. He's acted 100% fine since leaving the hospital (I joke that it made him have a growth spurt because he asks for food nonstop). I kept him home the day after this happened because he woke up at 2am!!!

We are going to go see a pediatric neurologist in a few weeks; one recommended by our doctor and our developmental pediatrician, so this guy must be good. I'm not really expecting to know anything more, but I am comforted by the fact that God was always with him, God loves him more than I do, and God will care for him.

The love we felt after this incident is amazing. I never want to leave this community. A family whose son is in Moose's class brought us supper, a friend brought lunch the next day. So many have reached out to see how he is. It's just amazing, truly. I am so thankful for our school and how they handled this episode (not sure what to call it); they did a wonderful job, so proud. The EMTs were fantastic. The hospital staff was awesome. I hope everyone call feel this love for your kid(s) at some point in your life, but hopefully in a totally different way.

I feel so blessed to call this town our home. Who knew Kansas was so awesome?!

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