happy

Today, I'm so happy. I woke up happy. I went to church happy. I came home from church happy. My afternoon was happy. The evening left me happy. It's past my bedtime and I'm still happy.

I think our happiness matters to God. I think He'd like for us to be happy. I don't, however, think that's His ultimate goal.

Sometimes in suffering, He pulls us closer to Him. Sometimes in suffering, He reveals Himself. Sometimes in suffering, we can't help but see Him.

We live in a fallen world and are a fallen people. I think we forget that sometimes - I know I do. I forget my own depravity. I think it's familiar. We often can't see what's right in front of our faces.

We are an egotistical people, naturally narcissistic. We want to be happy. And sometimes our happiness stands in the way of God's plan. We put our plans to action despite what God wants. Or, we try to. We veer from His course because this or that will make us happy.

Our happiness is not what this world is about. We were made to worship God, to spread His Kingdom, to love His people, to help other Christians in good times and bad times (even if the bad times are uncomfortable and awkward).

And the silly thing is, is that I don't think we truly understand happiness. I was thinking this morning that I can't imagine being happier. I told God that I can't imagine it, but I know in my heart that when I'm home in heaven, I will be happier. But my puny, human brain can't absorb more happiness than now...but my heart aches for more. Not more material things or more worldly happiness but more fellowship with Him, more intimate time with Him, more of His holiness and sacredness, more of His purity. I yearn for that.

As we go about today, let us try not to think of our happiness but perhaps another's. Let us be a blessing to God's children. Let us further His kingdom in small, intimate ways (sometimes those are the biggest actions of all, after all).

And yet, perhaps this is all easy for me to hear and write and feel because I am so very happy. Then again, I've learned that happiness is a choice and joy comes from the Lord.

happy at his first fish :) 
happy at his first (that he'll remember) flight

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