Thursday, May 12, 2011

discouraged

Ironic to follow a post titled "blessed" with one titled "discouraged" but that's how I'm feeling today. My sons are terrific - honestly. But gosh, their listening skills are lacking. I feel like they just don't listen.

With Moose, I tell him to (for example) sit down to poop. He says, "no pee!" If I tell him to pick up his cars, it's "no play with cars!" It's naptime, "no awake." I tell him no, he says yes. It's so frustrating.

I'm only half joking when I say I think Squirt may be a bit deaf. The child honestly acts as if he doesn't hear me much of the time. I would not be surprised if a hearing screening came back with concerns.

Today at school, Moose pulled a friend's ears (twice) and knocked over the blocks (twice). His teacher said he was being a bit defiant. They tried a weighted vest to help calm him down and get him to stop sucking his thumb. I read this in his bring home notebook...so sad.

I'm just at a loss. I don't know how to get Moose to stop mouthing back and Squirt to listen. It just feels like a failure on my part. I don't want pity but I am asking for some advice. I know some of you train your kids for first time obedience...how?

Anyway, I am going to go take a short nap. Naps usually help a sour mood.

6 comments:

thesavingmomparents said...

I read this post a week or so ago and have noticed a huge difference in my 3 year old since I started putting it into practice. http://www.aholyexperience.com/2011/05/3-guideposts-that-can-radically-change-parenting-free-printables-for-mothers-day/?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+HolyExperience+%28Holy+Experience%29

Be encouraged! You are a great mom and this is just one bad day in a multitude of good ones. You have wonderful kids. You can do it! Be at peace. ~Jessica

Stacey said...

{{HUGS}} I feel the same way so often! My kids can be very defiant (mostly Bria) and I just am at a loss most of the time! Keith is so good at dealing with them, but I just dont' have the skills like he does.

Cori said...

I don't have any advice yet. I haven't gotten that far. But, I am curious about the weighted vest. Is that what they do these days? Is it just to keep them still?
ILoveLucyJean

Kim Aberle said...

Randi, I know exactly what you are talking about. There are many days at the Aberle house that resmeble your day. I am still learning what works with Benji and most of the time, I fail. Shouldn't they come with some sort of manual? Just letting you know that I think you are doing a great job with your children and you often help me to think about things in a different light on your blog and in Sunday school class. I will be praying for you!
Love,
Kim

Krew Leader said...

I totally hear and feel your discouragement, Randi! Those days are tough. :(

Please remember that YOU are not a failure when your kids have bad days - we all make mistakes, but God does not! A wonderful quote I heard recently reminds that "Failure is an event, not a person."

To speak to the 'first time obedience' question, we found one thing that really helped us - an obedience chart. A friend found one online and I copied it. Here's the link for you if you choose to use it: http://www.doorposts.com/details.aspx?id=14

If you'd like the specifics of what is included in the 'if-then chart,' let me know and I can send it to you.

But no matter what, just keep talking to God, asking for wisdom, and letting Him lead you. Then, when things don't go quite right, remember that you aren't perfect and that your children can learn just as much from a Mom who admits her mistakes as they can from seeing her make right choices - we need them both to be a healthy example!

Hang in there, Randi! Sending hugs to you! :)

In Light of the Truth... said...

Here's another (free) if-then chart if ya want to take a look: http://www.raisingarrows.net/2009/09/ifthen-chart.html?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+blogspot%2FssxG+%28Raising+Arrows%29&utm_content=Google+Reader

Usually when my kids say No to me like that, they get a quick pop on the bum, and I explain that they are to obey and say Yes Mom instead of arguing. And then I say, Let's try again. I ask them to do something and expect the Yes Mom and correct action. If not, then we repeat. Hope that helps!

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