Friday, June 4, 2010

awaiting the proper time

It's a challenge for me to wait. I'm not a particularly patient person, especially when it comes to my kids' milestones it seems.

Currently, I am impatiently awaiting Squirt's first words. Preferably "mama;" however "dada" or some variation of his brother's name will suit me fine. Standing on his own will be coming soon, too, as this first birthday approaches.

I think that given Moose's age, I was ready for him to start potty training. It's difficult when your MIL has been not-so-subtly hinting that you should be potty training for two years (yes, folks, that's right). Or when it seems every other child you know has potty trained closer to 2 than 3. So despite his zero interest in the potty or getting out of diapers, we started to potty train. Despite the fact that he cannot tell us at this point whether or not he needs to go potty, we started to potty train.

And although I fear he may be slightly disappointed that he won't be wearing his "big boy underwear" for awhile, I somehow also doubt that he will notice when I put a diaper on his butt in the morning. We'll see.

For now, Big A & I feel like he needs to communicate better in order for this to work. I have no idea whether he understands that he's supposed to put his #1 and #2 in the potty. Some days I have no idea if he understands any words that come out of my mouth (or he ignores me, one of the two). I'm ready to fully understand my son. I hate when he tries to tell me something and I have to say "honey, I don't understand. Can you show me?" or "what? Say it again" as I desperately try to understand some part of what he's saying. I can tell he gets frustrated too.

The talking/speech is probably a bigger obstacle for me than his not potty training. I think with one will come the other. I do have a hard time when many of my friends' (younger than Moose) children speak with perfect (or mostly perfect) diction. I know kids develop at their own levels and blah blah blah but it doesn't make it any easier to know that. Because then you are left with the whys that can't be answered.

I don't know why Moose doesn't speak better and other kids do. I don't know why he cares nothing about where his #1 and #2 go and other kids learn so easily.

But. I do know that I love him and I need to follow by his lead. I do know that he's not ready to talk better or potty train. I know his time will come. I know that he's got so many other talents that maybe there's just not room in his life for this right now. I know he's a great kid and a really terrific son.

I do want to thank everyone for the comments I got here and over at the MOB Society Blog Frog Community discussion board. Tonight made me remember why I love this blog so much - you. It's such a support group, especially when I'm clueless about parenting or life in general. I appreciate you taking the time to answer my questions and help me become a better mama.


Erin said...

You are an AWESOME Mama! And don't worry I know everything you are going through!

Just keep loving'll all work out!

Michelle @ Flying Giggles said...

I know how frustrating it can be. Especially when we compare our kids to other children and worse, when other adults compare our kids to other children. The most important thing is loving them and supporting them with their own pace.

Erica said...

slow your roll lady bug!!! it is all in due oldest was a talker, seriously full on sentences at 12 months...she was not fully potty trained until she was 3.5, my little one is almost two and is just starting to really say clear words...she pees on the potty every point is it is up to the kiddos and in the mean time no sense in pushing and stressing everyone out! Tell your MIL to take a hike you will train when he is ready. I think it is sad that many many people measure a child by how soon they reach milestones...they do it from new born on "oh how long did your baby sleep?" I know trying to get to milestones can be an impatient process...but I always feel like when we hit one I am loosing some part of my baby..hang in there it will be fine! your doing great!

Theresa said...

You are doing a great job by recognizing the uniqueness of each child. It is hard when we have outside influences pressuring us to do what they think is right. You keep doing what you and your husband know is best for YOUR child.

Me said...

Awww, you're an awesome Mama!

Definitely wait until you feel it's the right time, As much as everyone else may feel it is, they don't know your baby like you do.

And it's definitely frustrating when you see other children hitting their milestones early (or earlier than your child). I have to remind myself that everyone is different! And it doesn't make it easier all the time but it's makes it a little better day by day.

Good Luck with everything!

Rion said...

This isnt for your post but for you to know! the Lincoln Journal Star is having some sort of father/son look alike thing (most likely for fathers day) and since Ant and Moose look so much alike..

Anyway, here's the link if you want to know about it!

N.D. said...

Thanks for your comment! You make me think that I'm not over the top :)

Alexis said...

Girl, I've been right where you are with the same thoughts! My oldest was a talker and potty trained perfectly by age 2. My second child is now well over 2 and a half and still has accidents every single day! She took her time with talking and I was a bit worried. It comes in time and it is so good that you see your children for who they are as individuals.
Cute family you've got!

angie said...

Every child is different. My number three had speech delays but wasn't bad enough to need therapy. Some kids just don't care about wearing diapers. Don't beat yourself up over it. Bet he does a bunch of things most kids don't!

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