Yesterday we put in our 2 week notice. Last night we chickened out on telling our boys. It's just going to be so hard. As much as I've vented about work on here, it's because I needed to vent. But we have had such good moments, too, and we honestly love these boys. I didn't think I would love them. But somewhere in the last 3 months, they stole my heart. Some more than others, but really each of them has just something I love about them.
I can't imagine telling them good-bye. I know that I need to because I don't see it in the best interest of anyone for us to have a newborn here. I will need to devote so much time to the new baby and that takes time away from Moose and the boys. That's not fair to the boys who really need someone's undivided attention.
This is worse than a break-up. These boys have become our life - our family. But I know that I can't be the same teaching-parent in a few months that I am today. I need time with a new baby. It's going to be hard enough on me to have to be with both of my kids; Moose still needs me for a lot. And the 6-8 weeks of not holding him after a c-section is going to hurt anyway.
I just don't know how to tell these boys that we love so much. But we have to do it tonight before someone else tells them. That would hurt worse.